Storm Chaser Network

Good Night And Good Riddance, Garrison Keillor

J Paris
Written by J Paris

We aren’t even a full year into President Trump’s term, and the opposition in Hollywood, the media, and politics are being picked off at a blistering rate. The word on the street is that Al Franken is going to be resigning soon. Jeff Flake is gone. Corker is gone. McCain will be dead soon. Matt Lauer, Jordan Chariton, Mark Halperin, Keith Olbermann, Charlie Rose…all gone. A wide array of producers in the media, Hollywood directors, stars, even Colin Kaepernick…finished. Face it…the Trump train is on a tear of monumental proportions.

 

But this post has a specific target in mind. Garrison Keillor. What a glorious day it is to see the obnoxious Garrison Keillor get sucked down the drain with the rest of the swamp creatures this early into the Trump Presidency.

 

I usually offer a primer on the subject being destroyed, but Keillor is really hardly worth going into much detail. Nevertheless…

 

Keillor has been hosting the idiotic radio show A Prairie Home Companion and The News from Lake Wobegone forever and a day on NPR, polluting the airwaves weekly (and weakly) for over three decades with the dullest radio show anyone has ever heard. I’ve shared a video at the bottom, it’s one of the “Guy Noir” segments from Prairie Home Companion. It’s abysmal. Dry, boring, humorless, and excrutiatingly painful to listen to. It’s only fitting that this show be broadcast on NPR.

 

Keillor’s show, which ran from the mid 1980’s up until the last year or so, isn’t the issue. Somewhere down the line, imbecile Garrison Keillor got in his head that his voice and his words were needed during the Presidential election. Why Keillor felt the need to dabble in politics, I’ll never know. I can only assume it was ego driven, like any and every other idiot entertainer. Hollywood entertainers brainlessly being political is one thing, but a National Public Radio “entertainer”? Give me a break.

 

Shortly after Hillary passed out on September 11th 2016, Keillor played his hand with his dumb Washington Post op-ed “Hillary Clinton’s Concrete Shoes”. I’ll link it here: https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/hillary-clintons-concrete-shoes/2016/09/14/eb033ef8-7a90-11e6-ac8e-cf8e0dd91dc7_story.html?utm_term=.630246205dd2

 

I recall reading it the day it was published, and upon re-reading it a little more than a year later, my opinion hasn’t changed. The op-ed is precisely what I would expect from Keillor: dry, boring, and completely pointless. Keillor briefly met Hillary Clinton at some black-tie affair while she was First Lady of the United States (I’m assuming the mid 1990’s) and she made a dry, humorless quip to him. That’s all it took to hook Keillor, convince him that she was worthy of ultimate power. His damage control op-ed is a mixture of sympathy for her and unwarranted reverence. Never ye mind all her heinous history, ignore the plethora of reasons why common folk disdain her. Hillary made a humorless quip to the humorless Keillor, and he wrote a meaningless damage control op-ed for her. Pardon me while I vomit.

 

I guess he got a free pass for that idiotic op-ed, but was too stupid to not exhaust what remaining goodwill he may have once had. Keillor, drunk on the smell of his own farts, thought it would be a good idea to play the same hand when his good friend (and fellow Minnesotan) Senator Al Franken needed damage control for his sexual assault photo. Keillor’s article appeared (again) in the Washington Post (Where Keillor’s Career Dies In Darkness) and is titled “Al Franken Should Resign? That’s Absurd” and I’m linking it here: https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/al-franken-should-resign-thats-absurd/2017/11/28/d33e2d8a-d482-11e7-a986-d0a9770d9a3e_story.html?utm_term=.a1f88dac6c43

 

This damage control op-ed is just as pathetic as his Hillary Clinton damage control op-ed. Keillor sounds like a pseudo-intellectual as he pointlessly drones on about name-changes and blah blah blah before finally simply addressing Franken’s sexual assault selfie as “low-brow comedy”. Rich stuff considering Keillor is the master of “no laughs comedy”. It’s the stuff of a pseudo-intellectual that has never had anyone definitively challenge him and tell him his work totally, utterly sucks. We’ve seen the photos of Franken groping Arianna Huffington, Joy Behar, and Leann Tweeden. There is nothing to defend, and a dullard like Keillor is severely overestimating his appeal and his own intelligence when he attempts to defend Franken.

 

Less than 24 hours after his Franken damage control piece, Keillor is fired for sexual harassment allegations and joins his fellow Minnesotan Al Franken in the pit of public relations hell.

 

Now THAT is funny!!!

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About the author

J Paris

J Paris

Navy Veteran and Community College Graduate.