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Comey: the Fire that Burns

Written by Hilary Schwartz

I am incapable of finishing a blog. Every time I write about something chaotic Trump has unleashed, he does something else catastrophic.

Last Monday, I did not think the week could get better. (Yes, everything is falling apart in a dangerous way, but because I hate Trump so much, can I admit I’m enjoying this?) It began with Acting Attorney General Sally Yates testifying before the Senate Judiciary Committee. She laid out a damning timeline of when she warned the White House about Mike Flynn being compromised and how the administration ignored it. If that weren’t exciting enough for Democrats, we got to see Sally Yates rip Ted Cruz a new one with one legal argument karate chop. That night, to savor the moment, I pulled out some cookie dough ice cream, ate the cookie dough while throwing out the vanilla, and watched that moment on repeat.

But nothing prepared me for the week’s O.M.G. moment. Trump fired FBI James Comey. I soon got the image of Comey gathering his items from the J. Edgar Hoover Building and walking out forlornly, carrying a plant in a box. Poor man. He must really regret handing Trump the presidency.
Most significantly, Trump fired the FBI director who was leading the investigation of his campaign for possible collusion with Russia. This was a blatant abuse of power, even obstruction of justice.

At least the media slammed him for the firing and the lies. It was day after of day of horrible coverage for wacked-out, deceitful Trump and his mendacious team. This administration has been such an abomination and assault on democracy, the only joy for me is seeing Trump and his crew suffer and crumble. And this week really delivered.

The initial excuse the administration used for firing Comey was that the FBI director was very, very meany to Hillary Clinton. Trump and his corrupt family must have been high-fiving each other over this “brilliant” idea. Instead, it may get the award for the most transparently false excuse ever. He fired Comey to protect Hillary’s honor? Not even a child would buy that crap. Every four-year-old around the country dropped their Fischer Price set and cried, “B******t!”

I guess this administration thought the Democrats would not be upset with the Comey firing because of his unconscionable actions toward Clinton. And the White House folks figured they could deflect this obstruction of justice and hide behind the Democrats’ slams of Comey right after the election.

But as usual, this incompetent team missed the nuance of the situation. Yes, we hate Comey for derailing Hillary and imposing an inexcusable double standard on the Clinton versus the Trump investigation. But once it was confirmed that the FBI is investigating Russian interference in the election as well as the Trump campaign’s possible cooperation, most of us felt adamant that Comey be kept on. He was by the far preferable choice over someone Trump would appoint, who we fear would squash the investigation.

To illustrate, here’s an example of a conversation which took place right after the election. Democrats: “Comey is a partisan ass. His actions were unforgivable.” “So, he should resign?” “Dear God no! Don’t let him go anywhere!” We knew, the only thing worse than keeping Comey was firing Comey.
And now we’re furious that he was let go. This is how much we hate Trump. Democrats have now jumped onto Team Comey.

The communications roll-out of Comey’s firing was a debacle. The spokespeople were forced to spew this ridiculous meany-to-Hillary-Clinton story and claimed that it was all new Deputy Attorney General Rod Rosenstein’s idea—both of which Trump contradicted a couple of days later. He in fact admitted it was because of the “Russia thing.” The whole thing was Nunes-level botched. And similar to Nunes sneaking in the dead of night through the grounds of the White House, Sean Spicer hid in the bushes to avoid the press. The bushes are becoming a main location for this saga.
I will treasure the image of Spicer in the bushes forever. However, if I were in Spicer’s place I would have hid in the bushes too. He faced lurking behind the leaves versus facing the press firing squad about this mess. Both were very bad options. Even expert deflector and liar Kelly Anne Conway fell apart trying to justify this one. By the end of her Anderson Cooper interview, her hair looked stressed-out and Cooper’s face was locked in a permanent eye-roll.

The country is in an unprecedented crisis. Will the Russia investigation continue despite Trump’s attempt to kill it? It must. There must be an independent commission. Rachel Maddow can’t do it all.

And just when I thought I was going to be in withdrawal after last week’s Trump fiasco, here comes the news that Trump revealed classified information to the Russians. This is nuts. I don’t know what to do. Do we just board up the country and call it a day? The only thing I can do is scream at everyone who didn’t see the peril of Trump: “I told you so!”

About the author

Hilary Schwartz

Writer and comedian based in NYC with love (and hate) for politics.
facebook.com/hilary.schwartz
@hilaryschwartz

1 Comment

  • This article is silly. Have you ever read Art Miller’s “The Crucible”? I suggest you familiarize yourself with McCarthyism and Art Miller’s backstory.

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